Children and Your Cup of Love

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It seems like yesterday when I got home D, BabyD as I used to call him. I remember being so scared and anxious, waking up from my General anesthesia, waiting for my newly born son to be introduced to me. Will he like me… will I make a good mum… what will life be like with a kid in the house… There were so many questions then…

Then, I have a dream like memory of that foggy morning I delivered our dear Zuzu, my first daughter. She is not with us now. How was I to know that we were for such a short time? We were so sure then that I’d have a son again… She was a beautiful surprise… she was beautiful. I remember holding her and crying that God had gifted something so unbelievably beautiful…

Then last year, when I had Lil’ One… she came as a fun little addition. She was funny… Why are her eyes blue.. why is she red and blotchy… she looks like a peach! A donut peach, actually…no? LOL.. we were blessed again…

CuppyCake is  really a cupcake. She is something we all want to enjoy for ourselves. Hubby comes along, picks her up and sits in his chair lost to the world. Son, everytime she is awake… cuppy wants to say bye bye to me before I go to school… cuppy wants to say ‘Hi’… she wants to see what I do… Lil’ one thinks Cuppy is her personal doll. She wants to feed her… pat her to sleep… carry her rocker off. (SCARY!!!)

With every child, life’s changed. We have felt like we have been blessed over and over. That, and you realise how with each child your children grow up a little more. It reminds me that they will be grown up before I can really enjoy each of them for their age. Six years and four kids later… life looks so full. Full as in fullfilled and full as in having your cup of love brimming full.

It is really amazing how that love reflects in everything that you do. That guy I called my spouse and was sure had a mind of his own, I look at him with, ‘We have four kids between us.‘ We have four kids to prove our love. We have four kids reminding us that we have love between us. Yes, that incredulous feeling!

The whole world looks rosy. I am not really sure if it is my hormones speaking or if I am really this relaxed that even though all three of them sometimes cry at the same time, amidst all the chaos, I sit laughing. The kids stop to stare, confused with what the joke is and then I give the eldest a little tickle to tell him how mommy really feels. He, in return gives his sisters the tickles and although most of the time they aren’t in the mood for them, the elder one sees her brother laughing and giggling, the baby sister quiet and mom saying something ‘interesting’ and she calms down. Our tantrum troubles are usually the nap/bed- times so, all is calm after some love and the babies go to sleep.

Your Cup of Love, I have always felt is what that makes people behave the way they do. Rejection, jealousy, depression, anger or acceptence, understanding, care and forgiveness. Have you noticed how different people behave when they know they are loved? A new mom in postpartum depression or a dad of a young family always tired, what have they in common? Yes, the lack of love.

Why am I writing about ‘love’, you ask? It’s February. 🙂

So… How do you keep your cup floweth over? Here, give these a thought:

1.  Love yourself enough. What I mean, is to take interest in yourself. Do the things that make you happy or help you feel good about yourself – a new haircut, a spa treatment, an afternoon at the library or a bookstore, cheering for your favourite team, playing video games with your best friend. Whatever will make you feel good.
2. Never head EAST (Everything at the same time). Take a break when necessary. Stop to breath. You don’t have to be a martyr because you are a mom and I don’t think any of us signed up to keep the house clean and the laundry done. 🙂
3. Get a housekeeper at least once a week if you can afford to or atleast once a month, if weekly is not possible. If even monthly is out of question, then ask for help from friends and relatives, especially if you are a new mom. Sometimes friends and family do come asking or hinting but we turn them down. Don’t. They love you. Love them back and accept their help.
4. Take out time for your spouse. You’ll keep each other happy. Remember, the real reason people get married is for love and nothing else. 🙂
5. With your children always look for more reasons to hug, kiss, tickle, talk, joke, play, eat, read and do. They grow up so fast and you can never make enough memories. There was a time when I took photos and videos of every move my kids’ made. Then I got busy. Then I got sick. The two aren’t related but, now that I think over the time I have not been taking pics, it makes me feel like there is memory loss. Did I play with them then? Was there not enough fun moments? Is this why my kids got anxious? When we record memories, we are making some ourselves. We are letting them be kids so that we can capture their kid moments. We are letting ourselves be kids too. We are letting that worry, that care, that tension in our life go on ‘pause’ mode to enjoy ourselves with our kids. So… Take more pics and make more videos.

How do you fill your cup of love with your kids?

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photo credit: Corey Ann via photopin cc

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